12 People You Know (And Want to Slap Sometimes) On Facebook

12 People You Know (And Want to Slap Sometimes) On Facebook

  12 People You Know (And Want To Slap Sometimes) On Facebook by ModernMelly We all know em, we all ARE them ( at one time or another, at least) and we all roll our eyes at them. Let’s get right to messing with our favorite Facebook-ers, shall we? 1) The Humblebragger Oh, the master-er … Read More

Thanks Mister

Thanks Mister

This morning when I woke up, I did the same first thing that I always do: I check my phone. More specifically, I check (in this order) my texts, my Twitter notifications, email glance, then ahh: my Facebook feed. As you may (or may not) know, that is my world news source; friends, family, politics, … Read More

Dear 44th Birthday

Dear 44th Birthday

Dear 44th, Aww, hey, what’s up? Listen, I just wanted to welcome you, and you know, try and make you feel a little less the ‘outsider’ here. I get how you must feel, 44; you’re not Ms. Hot Shot Big Deal 45, and 43 is already walked away with a ‘see ya, wouldn’t wanna be … Read More

12 Happy Pages For Social Media Addicts

12 Happy Pages For Social Media Addicts

  12 Happy Pages For Social Media Addicts By Modern Melly Hello fellow social media addicts! Disclaimer: This is not a support group, nor will I try to persuade you to step away from the computer/laptop/tablet/smartphone and go enjoy nature and a real conversation with spoken words and no emoticons. Nope, that’s someone else’s job. … Read More

Dear Everyone Writing A ‘Dear____’ Blog

Dear Everyone Writing A ‘Dear____’ Blog

Dear everyone and their mother that writes a blog, including me: STOP FUCKING WRITING ‘DEAR (insert person type here)’. Enough already, we get it. Seriously. Dear children’s costume company, stop making costumes gender specific.Dear lady at the gym that looked at me funny while I was on the treadmill eating a Snickers bar. Dear man … Read More

We Have Forgotten

We Have Forgotten

I admit it. I hash-tagged “Never Forget” this morning, posted it on social media along with one of the many, many, heart breaking photos from September 11, 2011. Then I immediately regretted it. But not because I don’t feel it, or think it. Not because I don’t have reverence and solemnity for all those innocent … Read More

Dear Modern Moms (Message from a Dinosaur Mom)

Dear Modern Moms (Message from a Dinosaur Mom)

With so many topics to choose from- Donald Trump running for President (love it. Gasp, I said it), the senseless and cowardly slaughter of Cecil the Lion (heartsick over it), Planned Parenthood selling baby body parts (conflicted about it), ISIS (violently hate it), Horrible Hillary(nuff said), and so many more mind melting news stories, I’ve … Read More

Ten Traits Sarcastic Women Share

Ten Traits Sarcastic Women Share

Chronically sarcastic women are oft misunderstood, it a basic fact. Sometimes it’s a literal “you-honestly-don’t-get-sarcasm, do you?” kind of thing, and other times it’s the whole “you have to know me and know what I know in order to understand why I’m sarcastic” deal. Nonetheless, we are a misunderstood species. Unless we are talking to each … Read More

If I Had A Soundtrack To My Life

If I Had A Soundtrack To My Life

As you, of course know (because you follow my blog so devoutly. Wink, wink.) I am a police loving, lipstick wearing, Steve Perry obsessed, I Love You, Man drinker, who has a penchant for imagining that I am living an ever running live TV show, of which I am obviously: The Star. As the star of … Read More

Police Wife

Police Wife

“We see their heart, we know their soul. We are their safe place …We are the relief at the end of a shift where they have seen the worst that humanity has to offer.”

Objectivity, You’re a Jerk

Objectivity, You’re a Jerk

Objectivity, You’re a Jerk By ModernMelly Objectivity is a jerk. And a curse. Seriously, it is. The day after the Grammys, which I didn’t watch (but read about the highlights and low-lights all over social media afterwards) I sat down to write this stompy, pouty, pissed off post about these a-hole “artists” and their social … Read More

Livin’ La Vida Saludable (Part 2)

Livin’ La Vida Saludable (Part 2)

It’s 9 o’clock on a Saturday (the regular crowd shuffles in… no, no just kidding. I’m in my kitchen, not a bar in a Billy Joel song.) and here I am, working on a post. Well, ok here I am: I frequently get asked about how I stick to my “diet” with so many temptations out there, … Read More

10 Songs I Hate, But Know Every Word To

10 Songs I Hate, But Know Every Word To

Ten Songs I Hate, But Know Every Word To By Modern Melly Ugh. This morning I woke up, with no discernable reason, with the song Rainy Days and Mondays playing in in my head. Now, A) It’s not Monday, it’s Tuesday. B) It’s not raining, it’s actually an M- F-ing blizzard, first of the season. Had I not seen … Read More

Dear 20-Something: An Open Apology

Dear 20-Something: An Open Apology

*Disclaimer: when I started this blog post, I was in a bitchy, pissed off, and disgusted mood. I’d been watching too much “news” with their primary focus on too many privileged college aged people making asses and nuisances of themselves “protesting” things they knew little to nothing about. My contempt, annoyance and disgust was channeled … Read More

%d bloggers like this: