Dear Mothers of Sons (A Request From Mothers of Daughters)

Hi there, boy mamas! I see you’ve already put on your defensive fuck you face, but settle down. We are adulting, so hear me out. Now, first off, this is only going out to a very select group of mothers. Not ALL mothers of sons. Nor is this something I or anyone I know, dealing with. Consider it a simple PSA for anyone who does need it.  First, I’ve got to take a quick second to say thanks to one of the best moms that I never met: the mother of my husband. She did it SO right; raised a man who respects both himself and women. Well done, Peggy. Thank you.

So, about that select group. I saw something this a.m. that made me shake my head and roll my eyes, and of course, had to write about it. I’m just wondering if this thing I saw irritates any other mothers of girls?! The thing is:  those memes. You know the ones:

Yeah, those. I’ve gotta tell you: every mother of daughters looks at those memes and says: “Eww, stay away from that one.” Us mothers of daughters already know your type (because we’ve either dated or, God help us, married one of your sons). You know who your son most likely is? He’s the guy who thinks it’s the woman’s job to pick up his dirty socks off the floor, put the dirty dishes (that he put NEXT to the sink) in the dishwasher, and then criticize how she does it. Usually starting the sentence with “You know, my mother always did it like…”

Now, the problem with you is not how much you love your son or how great you think he is. You’re a Mom, I’m a Mom- we love our kids above everyone else, I totally get that. The problem is that you’re such an asshole overbearing vulture figure. The truth, even though you can’t ever see it in your precious ‘Prince’ is that you’ve given the world a highly self-important, needy, demanding prick of a guy who’ll need constant reprogramming from your constant meddling. Just admit it (most of you say it proudly, actually) No Girl Will Ever Be Good Enough For Your Golden Boy. No matter what she does, you’re always going to find fault.

As a little side note, a little FYI- umm, ladies, they say that boys often pick mates that remind them of their mothers. So that not-good-enough girl? Yeah, she’s going to be just as tough as you, she’s going to put you in your place, and she is going to win that battle you’ve created. She’s got that one power over him that you don’t, and yes: she.will.win. So keep that in mind when you’re making enemies with the future mother of your grandchildren.

So, I guess this actually turns out to be a thank you note to the psycho-moms-of-sons out there. Thank you for flying your freak flag way high for us moms of daughters to see, and thereby warn our daughters away from. We’ll be encouraging our girls to date boys/marry men who’s mamas post things like this:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In short, mothers of sons, stop trying keep them your little boy and raise them to be real men. We’ll do our part in raising women who deserve that. Girls raised right will give you all the respect in the world, but with the expectation that you’ll know your place, because they WILL stand up for themselves and not be doormats to women who can’t cut the apron strings.

Hey, mothers of daughters: think they’ll listen? Nah, me either. Keep on raising girls who can either handle ’em, or stay the hell away from them! 😉

P.S. If I’ve pissed you off, then you’re DEFINITELY  that mom everyone else is rolling their eyes at. Get a grip, get a personal life and raise a man, not a perpetual boy that you can keep on a virtual leash. In fact, get a damn dog if you need something at your side constantly. Thanks.

Sincerely,

All of Womankind