The Therapy Trap, the Cultural Reset, and What Might’ve Been if We’d Listened to the Other Guy
Think You Just Need More Therapy?
Recently, I sat across from a dear friend, who – over a long coffee get together – shared her concerns for her adult daughter. She confided, “I’m just worried about her. She’s overworked both at her job and also being a single mom to three kids, then add to that, the divorce.”
I sympathized, remembering my own struggles post divorce nearly two decades ago. So, I asked, “I know she has you, but does she have a strong support network of friends? I know mine were invaluable as I navigated my days of juggling all the hats.”
She grimaced as she said, “Not really. But she has been going to therapy.”
My eyebrows shot up. “Not a fan of therapy, I take it?”
She went on to hurriedly explain that she didn’t have anything against the idea of therapy, if it was productive. Then she leaned in closer and said, “But the thing is, all they ever do is talk about the problems. Week after week. And when I asked her what she’s learned from it – meaning, you know, problem solve – she went on and about finding root causes and digging deeper, and… ugh. I’m sorry, it just all sounded so circular. Oh, and he wants her to go on antidepressants!”
She didn’t need to explain her frustration and concern. I understood… and agreed.
And? It got me to thinking: Why does every solution seem to require more sessions, more medication, more talking about the problem instead of just solving it?
So, I decided to dig deeper into finding the answers to that very question. Turns out, my curiosity led me on a path to learning about the legacy of a man who may have done more to shape (and break) modern America than most presidents. And, a man who had a completely different idea that might have led society down a very different (and healthier!) path.
The men? Sigmund Freud and Alfred Adler.
Freud vs. Adler: The Therapy Fork in the Road
At the dawn of modern psychology, two men stood at a crossroads:
One wanted to free people from their past.
The other wanted to keep them there.
Let’s meet them.
Sigmund Freud
Austrian neurologist, born 1856.
Saw human behavior as driven by unconscious desires, mostly sexual and aggressive.
Famous for: the id, ego, and superego, Oedipus complex, and a lifelong vendetta against religion.
Believed that trauma and dysfunction lived buried in your psyche, and the goal was to dig it up… forever.
“Religion is a mass delusion,” he said.
“Dreams are the royal road to the unconscious.”
Translation: Everything is your parents’ fault, you’re probably repressed, and also—God isn’t real.
Alfred Adler
Also Viennese, also Jewish, but radically different.
Believed in free will, purpose, and personal responsibility.
Focused on what he called “striving for significance”—our God-given desire to contribute, connect, and grow.
His therapy style? Encouragement-based, goal-driven, and solution-focused.
“Trust only movement. Life happens at the level of events, not words.”
In other words: You’re not broken. You’re just not done yet.
Why Freud Won (and Why We All Lost)
So here’s the million-dollar question:
Why did Freud become a household name while Adler got buried in textbooks?
Simple. Freud’s theories were:
Profitable 💰 (endless therapy = lifelong clients)
Passive 🛋️ (the answer was always buried somewhere you couldn’t reach)
Compatible with Big Pharma 💊 (symptoms > solutions)
Hard on the family 🏡 (parents = the problem)
Let me ask you this…
Now think about what that mindset has quietly taught all of us:
That children are burdens instead of blessings.
That strength in men is something to apologize for.
That normal sadness is always a disorder.
That childhood explains everything and character changes nothing.
👉 None of that sets anyone free. It just keeps us stuck.
Freud’s model left very little room for the family as a place of healing, took God out of the equation entirely, and nudged a whole culture toward a story of victimhood instead of victory.
The Culture Freud Helped Create
Let’s connect the dots:
| Cultural Shift | Freudian Fuel |
|---|---|
| “You’re a victim of your trauma” | Personal responsibility disappears |
| “Parents mess you up” | Family is suspect |
| “Repression is bad” | Restraint is mocked |
| “Therapy is essential” | Healing becomes a subscription |
| “Morality is relative” | Truth becomes optional |
Now couple that with:
Kids soaking up every message except the gospel
A culture that treats family as optional
Hollywood normalizing dysfunction
Pharma ads in every commercial break
Freud didn’t just influence psychology. He helped build the emotional scaffolding of a secular culture.
What If We’d Chosen Adler?
Let’s play “It’s a Wonderful Life: Psychology Edition.”
If America had embraced Adlerian values:
Therapy would be short-term and goal-oriented.
Mental health care would look like coaching, not confessional booths.
Families would be the solution, not the scapegoat.
Faith would be seen as strength, not delusion.
Kids would be raised to overcome, not overanalyze.
Instead of a culture addicted to diagnosis and dependency, we might’ve built a society of people who knew how to take a hit, get up, and grow stronger.
Sound familiar?
“Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.” — Romans 8:37 (NKJV)
What Can We Do About It Now?
Because I know what you’re thinking:
“Okay Elsa, cool history lesson. Now what?”
Here’s what we can do—no therapy bill required:
🔎 1. Question the Narrative
Just because it’s been normalized doesn’t mean it’s right. If the system says you’re broken, but God says you’re redeemed… who do you believe?
🙋♀️ 2. Choose Empowering Voices
Follow teachers, counselors, and leaders who point you to purpose—not pathology. Look for Adler-inspired, solution-focused, biblically grounded truth-tellers.
🧒 3. Raise Resilient Kids
Adlerian parenting aligns with the Bible: encourage, equip, and correct in love. Don’t raise victims. Raise problem solvers.
💬 4. Tell the Truth with Grace
Not everyone’s ready to hear this. But someone out there is desperate to break free from the lie that they’re doomed to be who their trauma says they are.
Be the light that says, “Hey… you can change.”
“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.” — Romans 12:2 (NKJV)
🤝 5. Build Your People
Remember my friend’s daughter? What she needed most wasn’t one more appointment. It was people. Friends who show up with a casserole and a pep talk. A church family that notices when your seat is empty. Healing was never meant to happen in a 50-minute block once a week, all by yourself.
“Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” — Galatians 6:2 (NKJV)
Final Thought
Freud may have hijacked the mental health conversation, but he doesn’t get to write the ending.
That’s God’s job.
And spoiler alert? He’s in the restoration business.
So if you’ve felt broken, confused, or like the system wants to keep you small—you’re not crazy. You’re just waking up.
And that?
Is exactly where God does His best work.
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” — 2 Timothy 1:7 (NKJV)
Frequently Asked Questions
Is therapy un-Christian?
No. Wise counsel is biblical: “in the multitude of counselors there is safety” (Proverbs 11:14, NKJV). My issue isn’t with getting help. It’s with help that never actually helps you move forward. A good counselor (especially one who shares your faith) should point you toward growth, responsibility and hope, not endless circles. And if you’re struggling with depression or anxiety, please talk to your doctor or a trusted counselor. Getting support is not a lack of faith.
Who was Alfred Adler?
Alfred Adler (1870–1937) was an Austrian doctor and psychotherapist who founded what he called “individual psychology.” He was part of Freud’s early circle in Vienna but broke away in 1911 because he believed people are driven by purpose, belonging and the desire to contribute, not just by buried urges from the past.
What’s the difference between Freud’s and Adler’s approaches?
Freud looked backward, digging into the unconscious and childhood to explain behavior. Adler looked forward, asking what a person is striving toward and how they can grow, connect and contribute. Adler’s approach was encouragement-based and goal-focused, which lines up much more naturally with what Scripture says about renewal and purpose.
Keep reading: If this one stirred something up, you’ll want Are We Too Obsessed with Mental Health? and Not Just a Big Ego: The Spiritual Root of Narcissism next.
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